These are some of the more shocking stories I've gathered over the years. If you have a weak stomach or you're eating, don't read. It's amazing how much this stuff doesn't bother me (except for the toenail story!) . Even though it's good money, it's barely worth it!
1. I've seen multiple babies born, though I've blocked all of it out.
2. I walked in a room and the patient, who had dementia, said "I'm wet". I thought nothing of it until I turned on the light and found him laying in a bed full of blood. Huge puddle on the floor. Everything was covered in blood.
3. I had an elderly lady who had fallen between her tub and toilet at home. She came into the hospital with a pressure ulcer big enough to fit my fist in. She ended up dying.
4. I had a paraplegic who snagged his big toenail on the elevator door and it was sticking straight up! I had to push it back down into place. Still gives me shivers!
5. I've had multiple patients with narcotizing fasciitis
6. I had 2 dementia patients fall out of their bed in the same night, the night they decided to wax the floors (which is both loud and stinky)
7. I had a patient with testicles the size of basketball, not naturally occurring
8. I had a suicide watch patient who said he swallowed a spoon. He swore he was about to pass it any moment.
9. My friend had a homeless guy who had maggots in his wounds
10. I had a patient whose foot had rotted away on the top. You could see the ligaments perfectly
11. I had a patient who had to have a tumor taken off her cheek. Her cheek bone was left visible
12. I had a patient whose eye popped out. Oh wait, that was House.
13. I had an HIV+, gay man who came in to get a penis pump implanted. We won't even start on that one.
14. I walked into a room to see my patient for the first time only to find him dead. It was expected and he was a DNR.
15. I've had a patient who came in for a hysterectomy and left with a colostomy bag. (law suit!)
16. The first plastic surgery patient I saw, I thought she had gone through the windshield of a car. No, she just had her eyes, nose and chin done!
17. I saw the x-ray of a patient who came in with a screwdriver shoved up his rear, pointed end first. A permanent colostomy was needed.
18. I had a young girl who needed a colostomy after her boyfriend convinced her anal sex would be fun. Exit only people!
19. I had a patient who had more surgeries than birthdays. 8 to 1. And she was still smiling!
That's all I can think of for now. I left out all the sad and depressing stories. Those would be much harder to write.
I'm pretty sure I was working with you when #7 happened. Very memorable.
ReplyDeleteIt must be because I work in the same area that I found a lot of this funny!!! Not that it happened to the people but you know the thoughts that run through your head when you walk in on that "code brown" pt that thought they could make it to the bathroom....
ReplyDeleteWe had a patient come in post op that had a "foreign object" removed from his penis. After he arrived...We were able to see the pictures and read the note. The pts girlfriend thought he was cheating on her and waiting until he passed out and shoved a sharpened pencil (point first) into his penis, punctured his urethra and was seen in his bladder!!!! Whew, what a story!!!!
I have a ton more....If you want em....LOL
This is absolutely hilarious!!! I can totally relate to the stupidity of people. It leaves you shaking your head every time but yet never seems to surprise you with what peaple can come up with next.
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